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We don’t do nights very well

17 Aug

I’ve never done nights very well. The night always brings on anxiety and stress for me. So why should it be any different for Lux?

Around 9pm she awakes from one of her many naps. I feed her and have her burped by 10 and the screaming begins.

We try literally, everything to calm her down. We change her, give her a binky, rock her, swaddle her, put her in a swing, try to feed her again… And she still won’t quit. I’ve even taken her for drives.

This evening I had all about I could take. I’ve been unbelievably tired the last few days. My mom offered for us to come over so she can take her for a few and I could relax. Lux was still screaming.

I knew this wasn’t going to be easy. But jeese, I can’t even begin to describe how hard this is. And I wanted twins…. Bahahahahahahahahaha.

However, when all is said and done and I look at her sweet face I know it’s all worth it. The screaming and crying doesn’t seem so bad because I know I have a healthy and beautiul baby girl.

I have to remind myself to breathe and give myself a break every once in awhile. Also, to know and accept that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed at times. I feel so blessed to have such an amazing partner. He could very well not take such an active role in taking care of our daughter. And of course, I’m lucky to have my mom so close to us and her to be so willing to help out.

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